The Unauthorized Autobiography

Table of Contents:

1) 

Q: Why was Mr. Snicket's death published in the newspaper? 
A: Probably as a warning, or a signal, and he didn't really die; he might have done it himself. Or it might illustrate the unreliable sources of the newspaper industry, as we see in The Vile Village. His death, by the way, was published by the time Violet was born, for her parents were going to call her "Lemony" after their departed friend.

2)
Q: Why has Mr. Snicket dedicated his life to the Baudelaire case? 
A: His devotion and love for Beatrice Baudelaire, or a promise he made to his niece Beatrice.

3)
Q: Why does Count Olaf have a tattoo of an eye on his ankle? 
A: The organization of V.F.D. tattooed the ankles of all early volunteers, so even Lemony Snicket and Jacques Snicket have tattoos. Apparently Beatrice and Bertrand didn't have tattoos because their children never noticed them.

4)  
Q: Where are the Quagmire triplets now?
A: What, still floating in the air with Hector, or whatever? Quigley, at least, is down to earth.

5)
Q: Who is Beatrice?
A: The mother of the Baudelaire children, but also Beatrice is the daughter of Kit Snicket.

6)
Q: What is V.F.D.?
A: Many things. Volunteer Fire Department, among others.

7)
Q: Why is there a secret passageway between the Baudelaire mansion and 667 Dark Avenue?
A: For the same reason there is a secret passageway from the Quagmire mansion to the Montgomery mansion -- an escape route, but it failed, obviously, for most.

8)
Q: Why isn't Mr. Poe as helpful as he ought to be?T
A: Lack of trust of young people -- it is his fatal flaw. Also, his sister, Eleanora Poe, works for The Daily Punctilio.

9)
Q: Why is Lemony Snicket on the run? 
A: Probably the same reason the Baudelaires (and all members of V.F.D., really, even Yours Truly) are on the run. He has unearthed ugly truths that some would not like known.

10)
Q: How many associates does Count Olaf have? 
A: At least 10. I heard once maybe as many as 40?

11)
Q: Are the Baudelaire parents really dead?
A: Unfortunately, yes, I believe so. But it is not as though people haven't been reported dead when they are really missing. It is hard to believe they did not make it to the passageway, but of course, Olaf is a master of treachery, and he could have made the Baudelaire mansion go up in flames within seconds. I am sure if the parents had lived, they would have found the Baudelaires at some point in the story, if only at the Hotel Denouement.

12)
Q: Is there anything a concerned citizen can do if he or she wants to help the Baudelaires? 
A: Search and research. Keep your windows open at night and listen to the chirping of the crickets. Ask questions. Do not be satisfied with answers - be always inquiring. Find your specialty and become a master of your art.

13)
Q: Who is Lemony Snicket? 
A: The Author of A Series of Unfortunate Events; LEMONY SNICKET: The Unauthorized Autobiography; and The Beatrice Letters, and the subject of my book, Lemony Snicket: The Truth Behind the Man. 

--

Sources: The Unauthorized Autobiography, by Lemony Snicket


--
The World is Quiet Here